Always
by thegirlwhoburned
Summary: AU! Prequel to A Spark To A Flame. Katniss can't handle the fact that she had to kill two people in the arena. Peeta saves her before it's too late. Everlark. Oneshot.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Prequel to A Spark To A Flame. I decided to write this one, because the Everlark part of the story will be more understandable. Katniss is a bit OCC - so is Madge -, but I hope you don't mind. :) Enjoy!**

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"Jumping wouldn't help, if you ask me," a man suddenly spoke up behind her, making her startle. She recognized the voice but seemed to ignore his presence which tensed the moment even more. Katniss wanted to scream until her throat sore, hitting something until she can't move her hands anymore. Her head was hurt - memories of her Games kept on wake her at night -, and by the lack of sleep she sometimes felt like she had lost her sanity. Everything turned from bright to black, other people's empathy never reached her. She had no idea what was Peeta Mellark doing there. They never really spoke more than a few polite sentence, exchanging them did not form them friends. The girl she was long gone anyway, no reason to try to save her. The demons inside her head had won when she decided to jump off that freaking cliff. Prim and her mother would understand, she told herself, the odds were never in her favor.

"Go away," she heard herself whimpering.

"You wouldn't die soon," he went on, his voice so gentle she nearly changed her mind. "Either breaking your spine or drowning. I don't think you want more pain, right?"

Katniss' head jerked toward his direction. "You don't know shit."

"Believe or not I went through the same hell," the baker said. "I was so desperately searched for help I can't even tell you. Whenever I looked into the eyes of my family or friends, I found only pity. They never went through it, that's why I was so afraid to open up again."

Katniss was aware of this distraction, somehow angered her the fact that it still worked. "What did you do?"

"I've found a person I could depend on," he explained, extended his hand to her. "Actually it was a memory, from when I was younger. About a girl, who almost died of hunger. I remembered that I helped her by throwing her bread and it helped me realize I was forced into the situation. I've never planned killing anyone in order to survive. I had to."

"I know you were talking about me," she stressed. Why could not he understand? She took a step closer to the edge. "I'm grateful you are trying to help me, Mellark, I really am. It's just not enough. I don't have any good memory of the real me. Whenever I look into the mirror, I only see myself as a murderer."

"My hands are also covered by blood, Katniss. No matter how many times I wash them, I will always see it."

"We are not the same."

"I doubt that." He heaved a deep breath, searching for words. "What about your sister? What would Prim say?"

"She'd accept it." Peeta shook his head.

"Do you really think so? Or are you just trying to make yourself believe so? You are lying to yourself. And your mother? She was a mess after your father died. Yours would shatter her even more!"

"Shut up!"

"Why? Because you know I'm right?"

"Shut up!"

"So Katniss Everdeen is a coward?"

"SHUT UP!" Her painful scream echoed through the woods, began to ring in his ears. She covered her ones, prevent herself from hearing more. "I can't do this anymore, Peeta..."

"Yes, you can." Without hesitation he walked over her and wrapped his around her slim form. "I've watched you in the arena, trying to support you by getting you sponsors. I've watched you never giving up… taking care of Rue. You can't let it lost. I've seen the good in you, you should just let go of the past. It happened. Besides, you can rely on me." Although she hit his chest hard, the blonde man did not show any sign of pain. She cried so heavily he was afraid she will choke herself. He cupped her cheeks, forcing her to look at him. Even with large rings under her red eyes she was beautiful. He brushed a few strands behind her ear. "You are strong, never forget this."

She had her fists full of his shirts, holding onto him. In return Peeta stroked over her spine, sending shiver down there. "I don't want to be alone..."

"You won't." His lips curled up slowly, not smiling at her but for her. "I'm here."

"Good," said Katniss, exhaustion hit her hard. She could barely sit on her feet. Noticing this, the man picked her up, earning a surprised frown. The brunette wrapped her arms around his neck, linking them behind it. She never let anyone carrying her, but the circumstances – and yes, Peeta Mellark – made up her mind. "What are you doing?"

"Taking you home," he replied simply, kissing her hair.

"Will you really stay?"

"I never lie," the man murmured into her ear.

Katniss looked deeply into his eyes, grey meeting with blue. She had never seen him more "Thank you… for saving me."

"Always," promised Peeta.

Katniss sighed before she drifted off. "You really are my rock."

Peeta smiled to himself.


	2. AUTHOR'S NOTE

I've seen you guys suggested me to continue this story. I don't know why you haven't noticed that it's a prequel. ;) Katniss and Peeta's story is continuing in my new story,** A Spark To A Flame**.

Btw, I changed my penname.

Would you like to read the Fannie (Finnick and Annie) version?:)

xoxo


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